Dear Shaunti, My husband and I have been married 22 years and I love him, but we’ve been arguing a lot lately. We both work a lot and have two children busy with extracurricular activities, so we spend a good bit of time apart. I tend to be a control freak and, as my husband says, […]

Dear Shaunti, My husband and I have been married for 20 years. I still care for my husband, but for the most part, I avoid him. I find him difficult to be around. I really don’t enjoy his company. I have felt hurt, disrespected and uncared for so many times that I have up some […]

Dear Shaunti, I just finished your book The Surprising Secrets of Highly Happy Marriages, and learned a lot.  But I also noticed that one of your research findings is the importance of not holding anything back emotionally.  Yet I’m also reading Boundaries in Marriage by Henry Cloud. It feels like a tension there between his […]

Dear Shaunti, I am irritated by all these generalizations that women should watch how they dress “because men are visual.”  Well women are visual, too.  There’s a hot guy at my office who works out by running the complex in gym shorts and no shirt during lunchtime, and I sure want to stand and watch.  […]

Dear Shaunti, I used to think I was crazy, but these days I feel like I’m the stable one in our house.  I recently read a news report where this guy called 911 because his wife refused to speak to him. It’s ridiculous, but I can relate. Just a couple days ago, we were out […]