What would you say if I told you that you could do one thing tonight in the bedroom for your husband that would most likely MAKE HIS DAY (or week or month)? Keep the lights on during sex. Did I just hear a collective gasp out there from women who are cringing at the […]

Sometimes encouragement happens in the most unlikely places . . . when we’re least expecting it. A few months ago, I was in a tough season. As I got into my car that morning, I was anticipating another stressful day in a long string of stressful days: my dad’s recent, incapacitating stroke had really thrown […]

We recently celebrated our son’s 16th birthday. Trust me, Jeff and I spent more than a few moments wondering where the time had gone. How was it that we now have a daughter in college and a son who is allowed to get a drivers license?! The celebration was simple, involving a dozen of his […]

In the interest of sharing a personal and ministry update, I wanted to let you know that the next few months are going to be an interesting season for Jeff and me. I’m going to go into what my staff jokingly refers to as “Cave Mode.” Here’s the thing: Jeff and I are finishing up […]

Unless you’re in counterterrorism, nothing good comes from keeping secrets from those you care about. And believe it or not, a recent and infamous business debacle has a big lesson on the four most dangerous ways we try to hide things—even in our marriages. For several years, I’ve followed the story of Theranos, the […]

I know what it’s like to take a daughter to college, and it’s not easy. So when a man shared this story with me, I could understand why his wife was acting the way she was. And it wasn’t her that needed to change; it was him. After they dropped off their daughter for her […]

When your husband approaches you for sex, it goes beyond a need for a physical release or a desire for pleasure. There are emotions under the surface, emotions that you might not realize are very powerful. Keep reading to learn more. 1. “I need to feel desirable.” We women often think sex is primarily a physical […]

From all of us here – from Shaunti and Jeff, their core team, and the the whole crew of writers, researchers, and advisors – we wish you and your family a very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year! Sincerely, Shaunti, Jeff, and their team Core team from right: Eileen, Charlyn, Katie, Shaunti, Caroline (in […]

I have an exciting announcement to make to all you ladies out there. If any of you have longed for help in figuring out how to balance and juggle all the things going on in your busy lives (wait, isn’t that all of us?!) I have a Bible study just for you. I’m so thrilled […]

I want to thank everybody who is digging in and helping us with our latest research project! As many of you know, our next book and research study is investigating why couples fight or have tension about money, why they do or don’t talk about money, and so on. Essentially, it is all about what […]

Guys, if you think things are going fine in your marriage, but you hear your wife asking perplexing questions like, “Do you really love me?” or “What happened to the romance?” see her questions as red flashing warning lights. They are alerting you to something you need to take seriously. (Thankfully, based on years of research […]

My brother asked me recently why I tend to wear a particular bracelet all the time. It’s a dark navy cuff with silver symbols on it—it’s beautiful and unique in its own right. But it’s also special for another reason. I got it on our family’s once-in-a-lifetime trip to New Zealand last summer. And it […]

Men, have you ever had a date with your wife take a turn for the worse and you didn’t know why? You’d probably both been looking forward to date night, with some time away from the kids and a special outing planned. But by the time you got to your destination your wife was in […]

I’m excited about my newest research project and I’m at a stage where I really REALLY need the help of a few motivated friends to conduct my next few test surveys! For the next 3 weeks (through the end of November), I am looking for 5-10 helpers who are energetic, outgoing, have good-sized networks they […]

My first job out of college was working on Capitol Hill, and in one early project I had to coordinate getting information from a lot of decision makers. So to make sure nothing got dropped, I also needed to ask a lot of questions. I worked closely with Ryan, another guy my age. We started […]

Our staff meets weekly at a local cafe. I love the breakfast food, the kind servers, and the familiarity of our home office away from home. Recently, though, I saw this new sign posted near the back wall to help customers find the bathrooms … and my heart sank. It seemed funny, at first. Then […]

As Leslie settled into bed, more than ready for a good night’s sleep, Todd walked into the bedroom and gave her “the look” she knew so well—the sly grin and twinkle in his eye that meant he had romance on his mind. Leslie tried not to let a sigh slip out. After running afternoon carpool, […]

Wives, how much input do you think you should have in your husband’s work endeavors? I recently heard from a woman whose husband runs his own construction business, and even though he’s in charge she says it really does feel like “their” business in most ways. She used to be in the industry, so she […]

Headlines about Millennials divorcing less splashed across the news outlets this past week. Phillip Cohen from University of Maryland recently published a study focusing on the noteworthy decline of divorce in the last decade. Shaunti and I were thrilled to read about this study and glad it has garnered so much media attention. Both of […]

**This article is part of our August and September 2018 Guest Blog series. During a particular intense ‘sandwich generation’ season (launching my daughter to college and my son to high school, helping my parents move to Atlanta, and tackling a major research deadline), I am taking this opportunity to introduce my readers to the insight […]

Now that the new school year is upon us, I’m reminded of a woman who wrote in to ask for advice on dealing with her oldest son who was having a tough first year of high school. It involved him leaving old friends behind in middle school, trying to make new ones, figuring out what […]

According to Deborah, her husband Marcus has an anger problem, and she doesn’t know how to handle it. They’ve always had “intense discussions,” but lately he’s been getting furious and walking away. As she tells it, they recently got into a fight on their way out of a restaurant, just because she told him that […]

We have all heard the funny saying that men are from Mars and women are from Venus. When it comes to processing strong emotions, this could be close to the truth! And understanding those differences will give you much better communication – especially when you need it most! Wives, when you are in a passionate […]

Sitting on the couch watching TV while her husband Jared gets a snack from the kitchen, Carla sees his phone sitting on the coffee table and wonders if she has enough time to take a quick peek at it before he gets back. It’s not suspicion or paranoia, she tells herself—it’s just curiosity. Jared’s been […]

After finding herself on the receiving end of her husband’s hurtful behavior one too many times, Andrea questioned me about a principle I shared in my book The Surprising Secrets of Highly Happy Marriages: it’s important to believe the best of your spouse’s intentions. As she saw it, all that principle does is give your spouse […]