Dear Shaunti, Why is it always men who look at porn, hide things, and cheat?  I’m a single woman, and I can’t help but notice that in the news last week, the one thing Josh Duggar and most of the Ashley Madison cheaters have in common is that they are all men.   Supposedly, even the few women…
Tip #57: Women, don’t punish your husband for being visual I couldn’t believe it when I saw one wife’s comment about what she did when she found that her husband had been viewing pornography. Understandably shocked and hurt, she next did something I found hard to understand. She not only refused to have sex with…
Dear Shaunti, Things haven’t been great between me and my wife the past few months. I’m not happy at work, we’re behind on our bills, and I’ve been pretty down.  I’ve gained thirty pounds in the last year from eating a lot of junk and watching a lot of TV, which is not good because…
Dear Shaunti, My husband and I were both pretty sexually inexperienced when we first got married, so everything about our sex life was new, mysterious and exciting. But now we have two teenagers and we both work full-time.  When we find the time for physical intimacy, it feels very forced. Like we’re just going through…
Dear Shaunti, I just finished your book The Surprising Secrets of Highly Happy Marriages, and learned a lot. But I also noticed that one of your research findings is the importance of not holding anything back emotionally. Yet I’m also reading Boundaries in Marriage by Henry Cloud. It feels like a tension there between his…
As I write this, I am sitting at the pool watching two twelve-year-old boys – my son and a friend – try not to stare at a gaggle of shapely teenage girls in bikinis. Also as I write this, on my to-do list for later is taking my 15-year-old daughter on an errand to pick up back-to-school…