The 30 Day Kindness Challenge is almost here!
I hope you’ll join us for the 30-Day Kindness Challenge to give new life, health and enjoyment to your marriage or dating relationship! You can join us by signing up to receive a new challenge every day by email.
About 10 years ago, one of my early radio interviews on For Women Only was with Nancy Leigh Demoss. In one radio break, she told me, “We have some hurting women who call into our program, and we can tell them their husband needs respect, but given all that has happened, they just don’t feel respect. They need something to help change how they feel. So I’m going to issue what I call the 30-Day Challenge.”
What she shared that day rocked my world, and since then I have not only issued that challenge myself to many women and men, but have tested it extensively in my research. I’ve watched time and time again as other independent findings, such as from one of my great research heroes, John Gottman, have backed up the principles behind it.
Bottom line: I’ve found the 30-Day Kindness Challenge to be one of the best tools in existence for helping to restore a hurting relationship or making a good relationship even better!
Here’s the 30-Day Kindness Challenge in a nutshell:
- Don’t say anything negative about your husband – either to him or about him to someone else.
- Each day, find at least one thing that you appreciate about your husband, and tell him and at least one other person.
- Each day, do one little act of kindness for him.
This means avoiding any words or tone that your spouse/ significant other will perceive as negative, critical or unloving (even if you wouldn’t have taken it that way). This means looking for and saying out loud the good each day. (I promise, you’ll find it!) And it means purposefully doing something small that is kind and generous, whether that means making your husband breakfast in the morning or leaving him a sticky note saying “thank you” for something he did the night before, or jumping in to do a chore that is traditionally not yours.
We’ll be throwing out ideas each day, but you’ll come up with many of your own ideas too. We will look forward to hearing your ideas, and your stories as we go!
And if you want a very special gift for your spouse or significant other, buy a journal and don’t just say your thoughts of appreciation, but record them. Then on the last day of the Challenge, give the journal as a gift – and watch his face as he sees what you’ve written!
Join us! For the next 30 days, change what you think, say and do and watch your relationship change too! Sign up here to receive a new challenge every day by email.