A surprising secret…about MY happy marriage

2014-10-08 10.21.23 HDRI got a great surprise a couple of weeks ago, just days before Jeff and I celebrated our 20th anniversary – yes, 20th, woohoo!! We got a contact through our website that was so out of the blue, my assistant actually thought it might be spam! A woman who was an assistant at a small church in Massachusetts said she was looking through old files and found one containing the marriage license and wedding program for a Jeff and Shaunti Feldhahn back in 1994. This sweet lady was worried that if she had the marriage license, maybe it never got filed and Jeff and Shaunti weren’t actually married! She contacted my assistant, who assured her that yes, we are actually married. It turns out, that was a file from our old pastor back in Massachusetts (who had flown to Washington DC to conduct our wedding ceremony).

It was such a treat to be reminded of that great wedding day; a day we all too often forget. So that is my challenge for all of us this month: if things have gotten a little bit stagnant or challenging, think back to that great day and remember why you married this person. Get back into the same habits you had in the first blush of love, when you would give your spouse a break when they hurt your feelings (“I’m sure he didn’t mean to”). Look at him or her and mentally recite all that you have to be grateful for – and then tell your spouse those things. “Be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry.” It is so easy to forget, isn’t it? Let’s agree that we shouldn’t have to have a copy of our marriage licenses arrive out of the blue to be mindful of those things that will keep us delighted with our marriages!

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2 Comments

  1. Hello
    My husband , Johnny and I, just celebrated our 38th anniversary. Your right on target let the Holy Spirit bring to remembrance why we married. For us, it His grace that has kept us together and to Him we are forever grateful
    Thanks Shaunti for sharing your life with so many!

  2. Yes, this has been an important practice for me when married life gets a little stagnant. It works every time to create that newly-married spark! We’re celebrating 25 years this year!

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