“It’s So Hard” by Danny Oertli
As mentioned in The Good News About Marriage, Jeff and I were speaking at a church marriage conference where Danny Oertli was the worship leader. We mentioned that so often we discourage people in marriage by saying “Marriage is hard” when what we really mean is “you have to work hard at marriage,” but for most people (as we demonstrate in the book!) marriage is actually happy! Not perfect, but happy. Danny told us when he heard us say that, he went into “songwriter mode” and this song came into his mind. He recorded a rough cut of this song a few days later.
Lyrics for It’s So Hard
I can still remember what the preacher said
When we were at the alter hand in hand
All his words were filled with gloom and dread
Bout how hard a marriage is, harder than you plan
Well I’m glad I didn’t turn and run that night
Cause all these years later, guess he did get one thing right
It’s so hard to leave you in the mornin’
It’s so hard not to think of you all day
It’s so hard just waiting for your lovin’
I agree with what that preacher said
It’s so hard
Then we got the warning from your friends
How life was so much harder with some kids
All the hugs and kisses soon would end
And our feelings for each other would somehow hit the skids
Well I guess I’ll have to grit and bare the pain
But I don’t worry much cause you’re one pretty ball and chain
It’s so hard to stop laughin’ at our daughter
It’s so hard not to wrestle with our son
It’s so hard splashing with you in the water
I guess it’s true what all of your friends said
It’s so hard
Maybe I should listen more to what everybody says
Maybe I should heed the warning call
Or maybe they’ve all got it wrong and don’t know what it is
To find blessings in the middle of it all
It’s so hard to leave you in the mornin’
It’s so hard not to think of you all day
It’s so hard just waiting for your lovin’
I agree with what they all might say
It’s so hard