For Couples

Marriage Monday: Mutually Reconnect With Your Spouse After Conflict

Tip #26: When you and your mate experience hurt feelings and conflict, mutually reconnect by sharing a private signal that says “We’re okay.” When it comes to marriage, it turns out that how you end a fight is just as important as whether you avoid one. Because in any marital union – just like any other true friendship or great…read more →

Marriage Mondays: Get in Over Your Head

Tip #23: Get in Over Your Head Man, our culture doesn’t always make it easy to stay married, does it? One of the most bogus messages we hear about marriage is that husbands and wives should keep a little piece of themselves private. You know, like feelings you keep from your mate but share with some other friend. Or a secret…read more →

Small Changes Make Big Differences

Tip 13: Realize that several small changes usually make the big difference One of the most effective things we can do to encourage our marriages is to knock down the widespread myth that marriage is utterly hard and complicated and that having a good marriage, or fixing a troubled one, requires a Ph.D. in psychology. Or a Master’s in mind-reading….read more →

Go to Church

Tip 12: Go to Church One of the biggest myths discouraging churchgoers in recent decades is the notion that “George Barna found the rate of divorce is the same in the church.” On the contrary, George Barna found no such thing – and the real facts point us to a key action for anyone who wants strong, happy and long-lasting…read more →

Never waver from knowing your marriage will last a lifetime

Tip 11: Never waver from knowing your marriage will last a lifetime I can still remember one of the most visually-effective points I’ve ever seen made by a professor. In my business school course on financial institutions, the professor was talking about a recent Wall Street scandal. He surveyed the usual horseshoe-shaped amphitheater, walked over to a student in the…read more →

Believe You Hit the Jackpot

Secret #10: Believe You Hit the Jackpot Here’s a thought to consider: if we gave our spouses more credit for their role in the good things in our marriages…would they probably start contributing even more? The reason I ask that is because the highly happy couples I interviewed and surveyed had a very different answer even from those who were…read more →

Don’t Tell It Like It Is

Marriage Month Daily Tip: Don’t Tell It Like It Is Have you ever been out in public and heard someone talking to their spouse in a way that made you wince? Like: “I cannot believe you forgot to pick up the dry cleaning again! I asked you three times. What were you thinking?” Whenever I hear someone use that tone,…read more →

Have Great – But Realistic – Expectations

Marriage Month Daily Tip: Have Great – But Realistic — Expectations One of the main reasons for unhappiness is having an expectation that is not met. You thought you deserved and would get a raise after a year of 60-hour weeks, and you got a pat on the back since “the budget is tight.” You assumed your friends would let…read more →

Hang Out…On Purpose!

Tip #8: Hang Out…On Purpose! At the most basic level, our spouse should be our best friend. And it turns out that the greatest predictor of close friendships is not shared values or personality – it is geographic proximity! You’re closest to the people you see the most often. Anyone who has had a close friend move away knows this is…read more →