Men Are Visual

Want a Truly Happy Holiday? Four Ways You Should “Let It Go”

Embed from Getty Images “Let It Go” is more than a Frozen anthem for the pre-school set.  It’s also a hard-core success strategy for giving yourself – and those around you — a truly happy holiday!  I saw the power of a few of these little actions in the research for The Surprising Secrets of Highly Happy Marriages, but it applies…read more →

3 things every boy needs from his mom

In more than a decade of research with thousands of men and boys over the years, one thing that has stood out is the power of a mom’s words to build her son up – or (accidentally) tear him down.  Whether your son is five or fifteen, several phrases are a big, big deal.  Here are three: 1. “I’m so…read more →

For Women: Five Reasons to Have Sex with the Lights On

Yes, the idea is scary for many women!  But in 12 years of researching the things our husbands wish we knew but don’t know how to say, I heard the heart behind this wish – and saw five surprising reasons to take the risk. When he knows you want him, it increases intimacy.  A husband is powerfully impacted by knowing his…read more →

Kick Those Other Gals Out of His Head

Dear Shaunti, I recently heard you speak at a conference, and I just finished reading Through a Man’s Eyes. I thought I’d be feeling better about my husband working so hard to avert his eyes when he sees another attractive woman, but I’m still struggling big-time. When I catch my husband looking sideways, I instantly spiral down. Worry and sadness…read more →

Getting Over the Fear of Lingerie

I spend a lot of time talking about lingerie. A lot. As a speaker and author, most of my job consists of going around the country and encouraging women to do scary things. Like tackle their clutter, or have that hard conversation with their kids. And for some, the scariest thing I ask them to do is to put on…read more →

Wives, Don’t Punish Your Husband For Being Visual

Tip #57: Women, don’t punish your husband for being visual I couldn’t believe it when I saw one wife’s comment about what she did when she found that her husband had been viewing pornography. Understandably shocked and hurt, she next did something I found hard to understand. She not only refused to have sex with him; she also put on…read more →

Bikinis, Boys, and Back to School Clothes

As I write this, I am sitting at the pool watching two twelve-year-old boys – my son and a friend – try not to stare at a gaggle of shapely teenage girls in bikinis. Also as I write this, on my to-do list for later is taking my 15-year-old daughter on an errand to pick up back-to-school clothes and sports uniform gear….read more →

3 Crucial Facts You Really Need To Know About A Man’s Brain

The funniest movie moment I’ve seen this summer comes at the very end of Inside Out, as the main preteen girl character talks to a preteen boy at a hockey rink. We’ve been seeing inside her head the whole movie, but instantly the camera zooms out of her brain and into his…. where his mental control room is suddenly in chaos. The…read more →

Husbands, It’s Okay To Be Attracted To Images Of Other Women

Within days of releasing For Women Only, based on my research study of the inner lives of men, my husband Jeff told me it was all his male buddies wanted to talk about. Not because their wives could finally understand them… but because they could finally understand themselves.  The most popular topic of discussion? The “Visual” chapter, where I explained that even the…read more →